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Random Warrior cat spoof that anyone can edit!
Yellowheart: DGFHV BMNJHGCXJHVBNHBCXCVBNHFVCNBHJNHCVBJHCHJHGFCGVKJHGFCFVGJKJ Brambleclaw: Ohh SHINEH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Firestar: Why is everyone crazy? Leafpaw: OMG DISCO! * Discos * Crowfeather: o_0 a new she-cat. HEY SIS!! Feathertail: (Comes down from StarClan.) Don't steal my mate, Yellowheart! Jayfeather: I CAN READ YOU'RE MINDS! Crowfeather: shut-up, Feathertail, you're blowing my shot! Narrator: Once upon a time, by a beautiful, blue lake, there lived four Clans of cats. Feathertail: *scratches* Don't interrupt! Narrator: *kicks* They were brutal, vicious and nasty, and they attacked each other constantly. *straightens tie* But sometimes their warrior ancestors would float down from the sky, and give them advice. ... Tigerstar: *hisses* Bluestar! That's your cue! Bluestar: *flustered* Right! Right then! *bustles on stage* Cats of the Clans, you are doing everything wrong. But my words will guide and strengthen you. Brokentail: *cues blue lights and singing choir* Bluestar: Eat not the cactus, for dangerous thorns will be your undoing. Dust blows along a winding road, and squirrels flee from foxes. *exits* Narrator: ThunderClan was puzzled by the message, but they all knew how important it must be, because it had been delivered in the middle of the day, and to the whole Clan. Jayfeather thought and thought, but he couldn't come up with a solution, so eventually it was up to Firestar to put things straight and save his Clan. Firestar: Eureka! I've got it! *jumps in the air* Sandstorm: *looks up* Got what? Is it contagious? Brokentail: *cues spooky music* Firestar: No, no, yes. *shakes head* Tigerstar: *leaps at Brokentail. Spooky music cuts off abruptly* Firestar: If we banish Brackenfur, Fernleaf, Leafpool and Icecloud, the Doom will be averted! Narrator: The other cats stared at him, wondering at their leader's incredible ability to reason. Brambleclaw: Yay! Hooray! Hooray for Firestar!!! The doom is surely averted now! Firestar: *coughs* That's Doom, Brambleclaw. Capital Dee, please. Tigerstar: *nods at Hawkfrost* Jayfeather: I CAN READ YOU'RE MIND'S!! Hawkfrost: *lowers curtain* END OF ACT I Darkstripe: *waddles dressed up like a fish* To be or not to be, that is the quest- Hawkfrost: *runs on stage even though it's not his part* Fish! MINE! *mauls* Tigerstar: No Hawkey! That is not a fish- Actually, who cares? I don't like him. *walks away* Narrator: As you can see, Tigarstar and Darkstripe's relationship has improved. Now, what evil doings are these whippersnappers getting up to now? Tigerstar: Now, my pretties, it's time to take advantage of this situation. Four cats are being banished, correct? We must choose one to train and use for evil!! Narrator: Big surprise. Brokentail: *cues terrifying music* Tigerstar: Look, Brokenfail, Just Dance is not suitable for this scene! Brokentail: *cues actual scary music* Hawkfrost: Say, Pa, what say you we choose Leafpool? She's already got one paw in the Dark Forest. Darkstripe: *muses* How can you only have one paw in the dark forest? That'd be awfully uncomfortable. I mean you'd have to sort of twist like this... *twists uncomfortably* Tigerstar: You're completely right, son. Where will we find her? Darkstripe: Or like this... *twists backwards with head between legs* Hawkfrost: *smirks* I think I know how much you smell Darkstripe: Or like this! *twirls in a circle and runs into Tigerstar* Tigerstar: *growls* You're dead, kitty! Bluestar: *dims lights* Jayfeather: I CAN READ YOU'RE MINDS I TELL YOU!!!! Molepaw: *lowers curtain* END OF ACT 2 Yellowheart: Get away, Crowfeather! I already have a mate! Crowfeather: Aw, what's one more? Me and Tigerstar had three. If you count Leopardstar and Nightcloud, who we were just extorting, but you know... Leafpool: Crowfeather!?!? what are you doing here! Narrator: *boots Yellowheart offstage and ushers Crowfeather and Leafpool behind the curtain* So Tigerstar and Hawkfrost set off to find Leafpool. Tigerstar: *walks across stage with Hawkfrost* Hawkfrost: I can't see her anywhere, Pa. Darkstripe: *puffing* Don't forget me! Narrator: *clears throat* Oh, and they took Darkstripe with them, of course. Tigerstar: *whips tail across Darkstripe's mouth* Sssh, there she is! Jayfeather: *Jumps in front of Tigerstar* I CANNNNN REED YOUR MIND! ICANNNN ... Ferncloud: *shoves Leafpool and Crowfeather onstage* Leafpool: But Crowfeather, our kits will grow up without a father! Crowfeather: But... uuh... I thought they thought Brambleclaw was their father! *mumbles* At least, I thought you thought they thought that. Leafpool: *cuffs with paw* That was before Hollyleaf died! Get with the times, oldie. Crowfeather: Uuh... Hollyleaf...? Leafpool: *rolls eyes* You know... Crowfeather: *frowns* Leafpool: *sighs* Our only daughter! Crowfeather: Oh!! *sudden realisation* That one! She died? Leafpool: *sobs* Yes. *buries head in Crowfeather's fur* Crowfeather: Cool! Shiney! *looks down at Leafpool* Uuh... are you wiping your nose on me or sommink? Leafpool: *blows nose on his shoulder* Poppypaw: *some how wonders on stage* do do do do... ur... Crowfeather: GET YOUR SNOTTY NOSE OFF ME! Yellowheart: If you'll be my sky, i'l be your- I FORGOT THE SONG! Crowfeather: * Going around in circles * I'm a magical pony, i'm a magical pony! ---- Person didn't put signature Scarletstar: *whacks with bat* Crowfeather: Where do you keep coming from? Squirrelflight: I like her. She whacks the WindClan cat who really shouldn't be here! Crowfeather: *teleports to cliff and falls off* MOMMYYYYYYYYYY! Leafpool: I'm coming Crowie! AHHH Squirrelflight: Bunch of *SENSORED*'s Hawkfrost: OH MAH RAINBOW MONKEYS DORA'S ON NOW, DADDY!!!! Tigerstar: Shut up Hawkfrost, you know that I banned you from watching that show! Narrarator: While the paramedics take care of Leafpool and Crowfeather, let's see what Firestar is up to... Firestar: You know, I almost regret banishing Leafpool. Squirrelflight: You ALMOST regret banishing her?! Are you kidding she's your GRANDDAUGHTER you should TOTALLY be miserable because you banished her and you should be regretting it! Firestar: *shrugs* Squirrelflight: Firestar you are sick. Firestar:Throws up Brambleclaw: Hey have any idea where our daughter Hollyleaf is Squirrely? Squirrelflight: Oh my you're just as bad as Crowfeather. Brambleclaw: What? Squirrelflight: I'M SURROUNDED BY IDIOTS!!! Splash brook: hey! Hole that causes pool: ohhhh supercalifragilisticexpialidousious Snowfur: SHUT UP YOUR SINGING IS TERRIBLE!!! Hole that causes pool: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!!! Brambleclaw: And where did you just come from? Snowfur: I'M FROM THUNDERCLAN IDIOT Tigerstar: I thought you were dead! Snowfur: So are you! Tigerstar: I don't like to be called dead. Snowfur: Well, you just ARE dead!! Thistleclaw: You both just shut up!!!! Snowfur:*cries*I thought you liked me! Thistleclaw: You guys are driving me insane!*kills Snowfur and Tigerstar* Category:RANDOM CRAP YAY